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24 Ways of Being Proud of Yourself for the Small Wins Abroad

By Kristian Voldrich · Published · Updated

Reviewed by Ohad Gilad · Fact checked by Ohad Gilad · Editorial policy

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Last week you sorted out your residence registration without help. Yesterday you understood a joke in German. This morning you cycled to work in the rain and arrived on time. Did you notice any of it?

Life abroad is full of small wins that nobody sees, including you. Here are 24 ways of being proud of yourself for the progress you are making, from noticing what counts as a win to habits that make pride part of your week.

Why Being Proud of Yourself Matters Abroad

Pride is not vanity; used well, it is fuel. So why does noticing your own progress matter so much when you live abroad? These six ideas explain, and show you how to start.

Talk Through What You Have Achieved

It is surprisingly hard to see your own progress, especially when every day abroad brings a new challenge. Talking it through with someone outside your life can help you step back and see how far you have come. BetterHelp offers online psychological counseling, so you can talk to a qualified counselor by video, phone or chat from wherever you are. A counselor can help you notice patterns, recognise growth you overlook and set realistic goals for what comes next. Many people find that simply saying their achievements out loud makes them feel more real. It is also a space to talk about the setbacks without them cancelling out the wins, which is how a fair picture of your progress forms.

Notice the Progress Principle

Small steps forward matter more than we think. Teresa Amabile and Steven Kramer at Harvard Business School studied about 12,000 diary entries from 238 workers at seven companies. As Harvard Business School reported in 2011, making progress was by far the most prominent event on people's best days, and small wins were nearly as powerful as big breakthroughs. A similar principle may apply to life abroad, where everyday achievements can also be worth recognising. A form filled in, a word remembered or a new route learned all count as progress, and noticing them can lift your whole day. Try ending each workday or study day by naming one thing that moved forward, however small; it changes how the day feels in memory.

Let Pride Fuel You

Pride is not just a nice feeling; it can help you keep going. In a 2008 study, Lisa Williams and David DeSteno at Northeastern University found that people who felt pride after success persisted longer on a hard, unpleasant task than people who did not. Abroad, you face hard tasks almost every week: paperwork, language practice, new social situations. Letting yourself feel proud of each step gives you the energy to tackle the next one, rather than waiting until everything is finished before you allow yourself any credit. Waiting for the big finish line means months without any reward, which is exactly when motivation tends to fade.

Separate Pride From Arrogance

Many people, especially from cultures that value modesty, feel uncomfortable being proud of themselves. They worry it means bragging or thinking they are better than others. Healthy pride is different. It is a quiet recognition that you did something hard and did it well. It does not require an audience or a comparison with anyone else. You can be humble with others and still be proud privately of how you handled a difficult month. That inner recognition is what keeps you going. You might keep it entirely to yourself, or share it with one or two people close to you; either way, the recognition counts.

Count Invisible Wins

Many wins abroad are invisible to everyone else. Nobody sees you overcome the nerves before a phone call in Dutch, or the courage it took to join a club alone and start your first friendships in a new city. Because these wins are private, they are easy to overlook. Make a habit of noticing them. At the end of each day, ask yourself: what did I do today that would have scared me a month ago? Writing down even one answer turns invisible progress into something you can see. Over a month, those notes form a record that is hard to argue with on days when you feel you have achieved nothing.

Compare With Your Arrival Self

Comparing yourself with other people rarely makes you feel proud. Comparing yourself with your own past self often does. A 2001 study by Anne Wilson and Michael Ross at the University of Waterloo found that people tend to see their past selves more critically and themselves as having improved. Use that tendency on purpose. Think back to your first week abroad: the confusion, the lost moments, the things you could not do. Then look at today. Looking back can help you recognise how your experiences and abilities may have changed over time. Some people even keep a note written in their first week, describing how lost they felt, so they can reread it months later and see the change.

Small Wins Worth Being Proud of Abroad

What counts as a win? More than you might think. Most internationals underestimate how much they achieve in their first year. And if you find it hard to give yourself credit, a BetterHelp counselor can help you see your progress more clearly. Here are six small wins worth celebrating.

Admin Done on Your Own

Registering at the town hall, opening a bank account, getting a tax number, sorting out official letters: each of these is a real achievement in a foreign system, often in a second language. Many locals find the same tasks confusing. If you handled one on your own, take a moment to notice it. Write it down, tell a friend or reward yourself with a coffee. Admin wins are some of the most practical evidence that you can build a life in a new country. Keep a list of every official task you have completed; by the end of your first year, it will be longer than you expect.

A First Conversation in the Language

The first time you hold a whole conversation in the local language, even a short one at a bakery, is a milestone. So is the first time you understand a joke, a radio programme or a colleague's story without translating in your head. These moments are proof that months of effort are paying off. If you are still working towards them, our guide to the host country's language and how to learn it alongside study or work has practical tips.

The First Friend Who Calls You

Building friendships abroad takes time, so the first time someone invites you, rather than the other way round, is worth celebrating. It means someone values your company enough to reach out. The same goes for the first time a new friend checks in on you when you are having a hard week. These moments show that your efforts to connect are working, even if your social circle is still small. Friendships abroad grow slowly, so each sign of warmth is worth noticing and enjoying.

Directions You Can Give

There is a special moment in every international's life: the first time a tourist asks you for directions, and you know the answer. It might sound trivial, but it is a sign that the city has become yours. You know the streets, the trams and the shortcuts. Notice it, smile and let yourself feel the pride of belonging somewhere new. It is one of the clearest signs that a strange place is turning into home. Other quiet signs include knowing the best bakery, recognising neighbours on the street and no longer needing a map for your daily routes.

A Bad Day Handled Well

Not every win is a success. Sometimes the win is how you handled a hard day: you felt homesick, frustrated or tired, and you still went to class, called a friend or cooked a proper dinner. Coping with a bad day without falling apart is a real skill, and it deserves recognition. Being proud of yourself for resilience, not just results, makes it easier to get through the next difficult day. Resilience is built from exactly these moments, and each one adds to your sense that you can handle what life abroad brings.

A First Month in a New Job

Starting work in a new country means learning a new team, new tools and new unwritten rules, often in a second language. Getting through the first month, with its confusing meetings and endless new names, is an achievement in itself. If you have reached that point, celebrate it. If you are about to start, remind yourself that every colleague around you was once the new person too, and that the first month is always the steepest.

How to Practise Being Proud of Yourself

Pride is a skill you can practise. A few simple habits make it easier to notice and enjoy your progress. If you want support in building these habits, a qualified psychological counselor on BetterHelp can work with you on practical strategies that fit your week. Here are six ways to start.

Write Three Good Things

One of the best-known exercises in positive psychology is writing down three good things each day. In a 2005 study published in American Psychologist, Martin Seligman and colleagues at the University of Pennsylvania found that people who wrote down three good things each night for a week reported higher happiness for months afterwards. Include your own small wins in the list, not just pleasant events. Over time, you train your brain to notice what is going right. It takes only a few minutes before bed, and many people find it helps them end the day on a calmer note.

Savour the Moment

Feeling proud is easier when you take a moment to enjoy it. A 2012 diary study by Paul Jose, Bee Lim and Fred Bryant, published in the Journal of Positive Psychology, followed 101 people for 30 days and found that savouring good moments, by focusing on them or sharing them, helped turn good events into a happier mood. When you achieve something, pause. Notice how it feels. Tell someone. Do not rush straight to the next task on your list.

Share Your Wins

Sharing your progress with people who care about you makes it feel more real. Tell a friend about the successful appointment, send your family a photo of your first homemade local dish or post a small update in a group chat. Choose people who will be genuinely happy for you. Sharing is not bragging when it is with the right people. It also gives them a way to feel part of your life abroad. Family and friends at home often love these updates, because they help them picture your new life and worry less about you.

Keep a Wins Jar

Write each small win on a slip of paper and put it in a jar. On difficult days, or at the end of each month, take them out and read them. The jar becomes a physical record of your progress, and it is surprisingly powerful to see how many slips pile up over a few months. If you prefer digital, keep a running note on your phone. The format matters less than the habit of recording wins as they happen. Add the date to each slip, so you can see how your wins change over the seasons.

Mark Your Arrival Anniversary

Every year on the date you arrived, take time to look back. What could you not do then that you can do now? Who do you know now that you did not know then? What did you learn about yourself? Celebrate with a dinner, a trip or a quiet walk somewhere meaningful. An annual ritual makes your growth visible in a way daily life never does, and it gives you a moment to be proud of how far you have come.

Reward Milestones

Decide in advance how you will reward bigger milestones: passing a language exam, finishing your first semester, getting a permanent contract. Rewards do not need to be expensive. A favourite meal, a day trip or a new book all work. Planning rewards ahead gives you something to look forward to, and it makes sure you actually stop to celebrate instead of moving straight on to the next goal. Write the planned reward next to the goal, so the two stay linked in your mind.

Making Being Proud of Yourself a Habit

The aim is not to feel proud once, but to make noticing your progress a natural part of life abroad. How do you keep it going over months and years? These final six habits help.

Thank the People Who Helped

Many of your wins abroad came with help from others: a colleague who explained the system, a friend who checked your email, a neighbour who showed you the bin days. Thanking them is a way of recognising your progress and theirs. A 2018 study by Amit Kumar and Nicholas Epley found that people who wrote gratitude letters underestimated how surprised and positive the recipients would feel, and overestimated how awkward it would be. Send that message. It will mean more than you think.

Track Progress Monthly

Once a month, sit down and review your progress. What have you learned? What has become easier? What are you proud of? Writing a short monthly review helps you see patterns and keeps your goals in focus. If you like structure, our guide to the things worth tracking when you move abroad has ideas for what to monitor, from sleep to spending to social time.

Be Kind on Slow Weeks

Some weeks, progress stalls. You are tired, the weather is grey and nothing seems to move forward. On those weeks, be kind to yourself. Progress abroad is rarely a straight line, and slow weeks are part of the pattern. Look back at your wins jar or your monthly reviews to remind yourself that you have moved forward before and will again. Being proud of yourself includes giving the process time.

Notice Others' Wins Too

Celebrating other people's progress, from a flatmate's job offer to a friend's language exam, makes pride a shared, positive habit rather than a private one. It also builds stronger friendships, because people remember who cheered for them. And noticing others' wins helps you see that everyone abroad is on a journey, with their own small victories and setbacks, which makes it easier to be fair to yourself. A shared culture of celebration in your flat or friend group makes everyone more likely to notice their own progress too.

Revisit Your Goals

Your goals when you arrived may look different now. Every few months, revisit them. Which have you reached? Which no longer matter? Which new ones have appeared? Updating your goals keeps them meaningful and makes your achievements easier to recognise. It also reminds you that reaching a goal is a reason to feel proud, not just a box to tick before the next one. Crossing off a finished goal on paper is a small ritual that makes the achievement feel complete.

Let Yourself Feel It

Finally, give yourself permission to feel proud. Many people notice their wins but immediately dismiss them: "It was nothing", "Anyone could do that". Next time, resist that reflex. Say to yourself, "I did that, and it was hard." Let the feeling stay for a moment. Being proud of yourself is not about ego; it is about recognising the effort it takes to build a life in a new country.

Conclusion

Being proud of yourself abroad starts with noticing the small wins: finishing admin alone, a first conversation in the language, a friend who calls you, a bad day handled well. Research suggests small progress is one of the most powerful sources of a good day, and that pride helps you keep going on hard tasks.

Make it a habit with three good things each evening, savouring good moments, sharing wins, keeping a wins jar and marking your arrival anniversary.

If you need someone to talk to right away, call TelefonSeelsorge in Germany on 0800 1110111, 0800 1110222 or 116 123, or De Luisterlijn in the Netherlands on 088 0767 000.

FAQ

Why is being proud of yourself important when you live abroad?

Life abroad is full of small achievements that nobody else sees. Noticing them gives you energy to keep going, and research links feeling proud with persisting on hard tasks.

How can I be proud of myself without bragging?

Healthy pride is a quiet, private recognition of effort. Share wins only with people who care about you, and focus on comparing yourself with your past self, not others.

What counts as a small win abroad?

Finishing admin on your own, holding a conversation in the local language, making a new friend, giving someone directions and handling a hard day well all count.

How do I remember my small wins?

Write down three good things each evening, keep a wins jar or a note on your phone and review your progress once a month.

What if I find it hard to feel proud of myself?

Start small, write wins down and compare yourself with your first week abroad. If it stays hard, talking it through with a qualified counselor can help you see your progress more clearly.

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